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Sloane18+

Personal devices

Sloane

$210 · tax calculated at checkout

A wearable curve with a pocket remote, paired by radio — deliberately no app, no account, nothing that phones home.

Remote paired · No app

Checkout confirms availability and sales tax; payment is a secure link — no card details on this site.

In stock. Dispatched same day if ordered before 1 pm Eastern.

Standard shipping $6 · free over $120 · 3–5 business days. Expedited available.

Plain packaging, neutral sender name, no product description on the label. Unopened returns within 30 days.

Sloane is for couples who want a shared wearable without installing anything. The curve is a low, slim C that sits held in place by clothing; the remote is a rounded pebble with one rose-gold button and a dial. They pair by radio at the press of two buttons and stay paired until you un-pair them — range is a generous room, not a phone tower.

No app is a feature, not a gap. An account means a server, and a server means a record that this object exists in your bedroom. Everything about Sloane happens between the two pieces in your hands: no firmware prompts, no privacy policy, no subscription, no discovery that the app was discontinued.

Why this piece exists

Sloane's no-app rule cost us a supplier and gained us a principle. The original quote had a lovely app with patterns and a login screen, and the login screen ended the conversation: an account means a server, a server means a record, and a record of this particular object existing in someone's bedroom is not ours to hold. The radio pair we shipped instead does one thing, offline, and the pairing dies if you factory-reset either piece.

The pebble remote is weighted like a concern bead — 34 grams, rounded, one button — because the person holding it should be paying attention to the person wearing it, not navigating a menu. The dial is continuous, and the feedback loop is the wearer's face, which is the interface we designed for.

Who it suits

  • Couples who want a shared wearable and refuse to install anything
  • Privacy-first users — no account, no server, no record
  • Long-distance-adjacent households: two rooms of range, no network

Who it does not suit

  • Anyone wanting app patterns, schedules or connectivity — we do not do that
  • Solo users; the remote is the second half of the product and it wants a partner

Specification

Measured, not estimated.

Dimensions are nominal and may vary by up to 3 mm between batches. If a figure matters for a specific use, ask and we will measure the piece in stock.

Body materialPlatinum-cured silicone, matte finish, phthalate-free
PiecesWearable curve (112 mm) + remote pebble
PairingRadio, button-paired, 15 m indoor range
Weight148 g together
Settings3 intensities × 3 patterns, dial on remote
BatteryCurve 90 min charge; remote 6-month coin cell
ChargingMagnetic USB-C cable included
Water resistanceIPX7 curve; remote IPX5
PairingButton-pair, 15 m indoor, dies on factory reset
PrivacyNo app, no account, no firmware updates, no telemetry
Remote batteryCR2032 coin cell, ~6 months

In the box

  • Sloane wearable curve
  • Pocket remote pebble
  • Coin cell (pre-installed)
  • Magnetic USB-C charging cable
  • Pairing card

Use and care

Everything we know about keeping it.

Before the first use

Charge the curve, pop the remote's coin cell tab, and press both power buttons for three seconds until the ring blinks twice — they are paired.

Cleaning

The curve is IPX7 and rinses; the remote wipes with a damp cloth and should never go under the tap.

Storage

Store them apart or the curve may wake the remote in a bag. Long gaps between uses: the coin cell holds a year.

Long-term

The radio pair is the part that can degrade, and it degrades as range, not failure — if two rooms becomes one room, the coin cell is the first suspect and the curve's charge the second. The curve's battery is standard Li-ion care. The remote has no charging: replace the coin cell yearly, recycle the old one, and if you ever sell or pass the set on, factory-reset both pieces so the pairing dies with your relationship to it.

Material safety. Platinum-cured silicone, phthalate-free, non-porous. Clean with warm water and mild unscented soap or a silicone-safe cleanser; avoid alcohol and silicone-based lubricants, which dull a matte finish and can leave a film. Full detail in the materials guide.

Delivery & discretion

Between here and your door.

  • Plain as standard

    Unbranded carton, plain white label, neutral sender name, customs line reads “wellness goods”. No invoice inside unless you ask.

  • Timing

    Same-day dispatch before 1 pm Eastern; three to five business days standard, two expedited. Hold-at-location delivery on request.

  • Returns

    Unopened within 30 days with a prepaid label and no reason asked. Faulty items are replaced on a photograph, not a posting.

About this piece

Does the remote work through walls?
One interior wall, yes; two rooms is the honest spec. It is radio, not wifi, and it degrades gracefully — no dropouts, just less range as the battery fades.
Can Sloane be tracked or accessed remotely?
No. There is no app, no account, no radio path beyond the paired remote, and no firmware that could add one. The pairing is between the two pieces in your hands and nothing else.

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